Thursday, March 22, 2007

Job Opening from Hell

I arrive to do a whole day interview process and induction in a well renowned reputable firm, fully backed by an elite clientele as well as a few ministers and other very important public and private figures. After the interview that lasted for 2 hours, It was time for me to take a break and go out with people my age!

Instead the CEO corners me in his office (A local) and insists and demands I go out to lunch with him, and even picks up his car keys and makes me way so that I can go with him and kicks out a senior employee from his office in the process.

At lunch he orders his favourites and every other possible dish available in the kitchen, and even tests the water and sees if alcohol is an option for me. I of course say no, and the conversations, as hard as I tried to keep them on the job, drifted somehow to men, women and their relationships!

For some reason I felt like I was being held hostage in that firm for the whole day. I stayed there till 8 o'clock at night, and worse, for about 3 hours I was in the CEO's office. He was taking every opportunitiy to get me tea, water, food. and talking endlessly!

Before I leave finally at 8 pm at night I am actually asked out for dinner by the CEO! more food? He even asked for my personal number, and suggested we go to the mall! What kind of job interview is this. My friend finally comes to my rescue (I have no means of contacting anyone the whole time as I am a hostage), and he even asks who she is and takes her number! Thank god for the creativity and intelligence we have for making up numbers.

I check my email after I finally leave, and I find one of the senior employees at the firm Wondering if he will ever be able to cook a meal for me, if we will ever play golf together, and if I am the one for him?! Another email sent went along the lines of you are gorgeous you smell good you are beatiful you are a flower. And yet another said that i should join the firm as I wouldnt know maybe my destiny and future love could be found if i did. As if all of that wasn't enough he also said that i never know I might meet the right person if I move to their firm!!

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Latest pick-up line

Okay now check this out, you really gotta imagine this while remembering you're in the middle of a desert filled with skyscrapers..

White sexy Porsche Cayenne with extremely tinted windows passes by you while you're walking and comes to an abrupt stop, quickly reverses to catch up with you and slowly rolls down his black tinted windows so you can see his so not sexy face, actually just his horrible gay chanel shades and barely the lips while holding the most horrible invention on earth.. the midwa'7 (aka the arabic pipe/legal drug) and says "ti7fi6'een wela itsajleeen" (you'll memorize or save it on your fone?)

Friday, March 9, 2007

Driving skills

In a country where the majority can't drive since their minds are still stuck to the pre-historic times where this land was covered with sand and thus road rules are non-existent in their tiny weeny sad minds of theirs esp when they drive 4x4s its amazing how when they wanna flirt they can so easily keep up to your speed.. You step on it, he does too, you slow down, he does too.. the amazing part is that there never is lag between you two, he seems to always be right there persistent until his number is taken!

Thursday, March 8, 2007

The art of flirting

Seeing as I find it soo difficult to find a man, I figured why not sit back and watch the various arts of flirting that our precious young men use to "woo" the young ladies shroweded in black..

  1. Find any scrap piece of paper and flick it in the direction of the lady - just pray she can catch!
  2. Chase her till your feet and tongue go numb from following and repeating your number over and over.
  3. Follow step two, but make sure you reach her car (provided she drives) and note down her car plate number. Then, using your contacts find her name and phone number.
  4. If your contacts were useless then drive around town aimlessly till one day miraculously you see her car again and follow step one but this time towards the car
  5. Bluetooth!!! Provided you get the right name since bluetooth has become the new chat in the country and the new means of dating

I believe that sums it all! What a limited art!

Monday, March 5, 2007

Not so sweet ending!

The beginning of this story sounds promising, but the ending will surprise, or even shock some of you!

He had been interested in me for over three years apparently. and I believed it. I had seen him around socially and out in the open with friends, family and relatives. He had seen me many times before but had difficulty getting in touch, until one day he tried and was successful!

He was a very nice guy. Very smart, hard working and I am sure highly affectionate and an emotionally available potential mate. He found me, which is always nice when it comes to guys and girls. Guys doing the work is the natural thing, never the girl. He kept on getting in touch, which was lovely. We met up , we exchanged stories, talks, discussions, you name it!! Things were going okay. There was still no commitment, no love and nothing else. One bad habit was observed though. He was overly romantic in words far too soon, saying the words love, happiness and eternity all in one sentence, which sounded scarey.

Another worse habit was that he would cancel out on outings sometimes; always with a very good plausible excuse though. He managed to do that about three times. I realized that I didn't feel like being in touch since he did that! However, what impressed me about this guy was that he always did call, always apologized and was always in touch regardless of some mishaps during meeting up. Some days I got busy and totally forgot him. He expected too much so far so far as phone calls and stuff, and I didnt have the time or energy and interest to exchange that with him. He was nice and all but that's about it! I never really felt like calling him, which made me feel on top of the world somehow.

He kept on saying substantial things which freaked me out. like he loved me! or that he wanted to do things with me! like holidays and god knows what. I knew something was wrong with this person; and on some level believe it or not. Despite the fact he could be the perfect boyfriend, was so nice, polite and decent; deep down inside, truly and unmistakebly I felt like he was a liar. There was something dishonest about him, despite his tone, style, words and supposadely liberal thinking. and Time only proved me right!

The fact of the matter is, when a guy pursues a girl and is consistent with her, that proves his love for her. And this doesnt mean for a few weeks. I am talking about a lifetime of pursual and a show of affection. A lifetime is just a hyperbole for the fact that the pursual must definately last more then a month! With this guy it lasted for a month or two, but as soon as I faced an obstacle, which is got to busy for him , which I honestly did; as soon as I had things to take care of; circumstances to deal with, he was off the radar. He was angry I hadnt been in touch for some time even though he knew that I was living my life quite busy; however he asked me to get in touch with him. I sent him a msg once and after that and I never heard from him again.

To be honest, I am glad I got rid of him because he was pretty ordinary and there was no chemistry. But this story shows you that even when a guy is seriously interested in you for many years, and seems perfect in every way, which this guy was, it doesn't necessarily work out to be a fairy tale story. He was no cheat or player, but in spite of his serious nature and apparent decency he let go of me pretty quick which means all his promises of love and adoration floated into thin air!

Good riddance!